Please join me in remembering the short life of 22 lovingly baked confetti cupcakes that were to be eaten at my precious daughter's 2nd birthday party.
The cupcakes, complete with Dora the Explorer wrappers, were brutally
murder while sitting innocently on my kitchen counter, waiting to be
frosted this morning.
Two suspects have been named in the tragedy. A 1 1/2 year old
Australian shepherd mix named Boss and a 7 year old Rat Terrier named
Bradley are being held for questioning. It is thought that while Boss is
the one who reached up on the counter and pulled down the cupcakes
(they were sitting on a cup towel), Bradley has been named an acomplice.
Here is a photo of the suspects:
Not a trace of the cupcakes have been found but investigators have
said they will be combing the back yard in the next couple of days,
looking for evidence.
Update: The body of one of the cupcakes was recovered in the laundry
room. Although intact, it could not be saved. It was covered in dog hair
The family will proceed with the party as planned. They were quoted
as saying "We feel that's what the cupcakes would have wanted."
A friend of the family, killberry, has created this touching eulogy. Never forget.
Though I walk through the valley of the baking confections, I shall
fear no canine, for Tupperware art with me. Its locking lid and
cupcake-slots, keep me in place.
You were grown in the Earth and to the Earth you shall return. Let
us not mourn the loss of these tasty morsels, but rejoice in the fond
memories of them once being with us.
Rest well confetti treats, your sacrifice will not be forgotten. The
icing will go on to frost another, but you will always remain a short
part of its existence.